We’re not on Zoom because we’re working. I’m not even sure what we do anymore can be called work. It’s a simulation of work. We get on Zoom and report on whether targets, projections, and KPIs (whatever the good godfuck those are) have been met, we move things around a spreadsheet. We shuffle the chairs on the Titanic. We make proclamations about how much hot air we’ll be moving from one location to another location. We get and give updates on how close we are to achieving a breakthrough which is always right around the corner. We fire up some slop generator to come up with our next response. And just for kicks, we’ll do a complete reorg every couple of weeks. All while Chad and Todd backchannel about Cheryl’s cleavage.
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